On Sunday, August 12, I delivered the following talk during services at Unity North Spiritual Center. Like one of my previous posts, it deals with not becoming like that which troubles us.
The Times in Which We Live
It’ll be no surprise if I say we live in strange and stressful times with fractious politics, unsolved societal problems and hostile tribalism. Still, most of us have most of what we need, and we have much for which we are grateful. And we have each other. But still, we are faced with the unpleasantness that comes to us in the news, in social media and sometimes in the complaining rants of some of our family and friends. It reminds me of part of a poem that goes this way:
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
It sounds like today, but this was written nearly a hundred years ago by William Butler Yeats – and we seem to have survived what was going on then.
These stresses have become almost a way of life for us, as well as tools for political manipulation, and manufactured outrage to stir up fear and anger against some real or imagined threat. It’s easy to be distracted, angry, upset, disillusioned, confused, defeated, helpless – so easy, at least for me, to sometimes become absorbed into that which I find objectionable. It absorbs my attention and takes over what’s in my head.
Most of us have some way to get out of such states, whether that is meditation, prayer, HeartMath, entertainment, physical activities, engaging in something we love, going into the woods, coming here for inspiration – and it usually works, for a while.
We try to hold to our beliefs to help keep us on track, yet there’s always the seduction into unpleasantness – and we want to fight.
I often want to withdraw and find a retreat on a mountain, to get away from it all. Of course, we don’t have mountains here in Minnesota like those where I used to live in Maryland. I went there so often, my children called it “Daddy’s Mountain.”
As tempting as it is to stay out of such struggles, we cannot escape the consequences of them for they affect how we live, what is in our consciousness, what our children inherit, what populations get made into second-class citizens, and which vulnerable citizens we are willing to sacrifice for some ideology.
In that attempt to escape, what is it that we really want? Well, I want to re-attune to the depth of the spirit in me, indulge in the brightness of the teachings of our great thinkers, and to immerse myself in nature’s embrace.
But I’m left with the question: what is the impact on us to have to even struggle with such things – and by such things I mean the troubles of the world, as well as our own reactions and consciousness?
The Impact of Stress
I’ve spoken in seminars and written elsewhere about the physiological and cognitive effects of stress. (As the bumper sticker says, “Fearful People Do Stupid Things” because it disrupts our thinking process.) We can be momentarily absorbed by that which we find objectionable and want to resist – but then we lose touch with our own deep values. The greater danger that I see is that, in the discord and attention-grabbing news items, we forget who we are. We forget we have our own connection to the divine. We forget who we are as a community, and as a nation.
This I see as a form of soul loss. I believe we lose our identity (and our happiness) when our values, our beliefs and our actions are not in alignment. I’m postulating here three facets of human-beingness: values that come from our hearts; beliefs (that are really just thoughts to which we are attached); and our actions.
Put another way, when our mind, heart and muscles are not working together for the realization of the soul on earth, we experience soul loss.
In the stress of these times, we know what we are against, but can forget what we fight for.
Re-Membering
So, one way to get through such times and restore our identity, I suggest, is to look to our deep values – what is underneath all those thoughts and beliefs and rules and commandments to do certain things.
We must also remember that it is not just the other person who is the source of our outrage. Something in us has been offended, violated, or threatened. Something in us is having a response. To not lose our identity in response to that offending thing or person, we must re-establish what we are for, and this should be determined by our values – both group values and individual values. In this self-reflection, we don’t need to withdraw from the world, but we can bring to the world what we value.
Let’s look at some historical values, values that went beyond simplistic obedience to authority or following external rules. Again, you often must look beneath the words.
Biblical
In the Old Testament, we find the story of Lot and his wife who, having fed two strangers, discovered they were angels. Again and again, the old testament admonishes us to take care of the travelers and exiles. And we find in the book of Hebrews (13:2) “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it.” This has been a common cultural value in the Middle East and elsewhere.
We find an interesting parallel in a Greek story.
Greek
Philemon and Baucus were an old couple in Phrygia. Two strangers dressed as peasants had been going through the town asking for a place to sleep but they found no kindness there until they came to the home of Philemon and Baucus. They were welcomed by the old couple, and served food and wine. The strangers eventually revealed themselves to be Zeus and Hermes (so even the gods seek hospitality). They then destroyed the town for its unkindness but made the cottage of Philemon and Baucus into a Temple in which they lived as guardians until they died together.
Gospels
When we consider what the actions and teachings of Jesus reveal about his values, we find the heart of them to be love and forgiveness. We see in the parable of the Good Samaritan how his values violated cultural standards of his culture’s social divisions and, instead, taught that all are our neighbors and deserve love.
Clearly he taught a different set of values than what was held by the society at large, and these values became a threat to the religious and political establishment of his time. It seems that advocating care for the poor and the sick, and calling leaders to task regarding the inequities of their society was as radical in those days as it appears to be today.
Celtic
When Rhonda asked me if I would do this talk, I happened to be reading about old Celtic society and their values of education (where the educated elite were held in high regard because they were the healers, scientists, priests and poets). They also placed a high value on hospitality. They had a high regard for truth and the keeping of one’s word; and the expectation that their leaders should be without blemish for, if they were defective, the land would not prosper.
In one of the old stories, a Faerie King looked favorably on an Irish King and gave him a Cup of Truth. This Cup of Truth had a quality that if three lies were said near it, it would shatter. And if three truths were said, it would come back together, restored. Imagine if we had that today.
Of course, the early Irish were humans like us and had many faults by our modern standards, but we can see some of what they valued – and what we have yet to achieve.
America
Our own country has an expressed a set of values defined by constitutional agreement – things like justice and equality (at least for white males until the 14th amendment, not to mention women getting the vote only a hundred years ago) We’ve come a long way, perhaps, but we are still struggling to fully realize these values for everyone.
My point here is not to get lost in history but to remind us all seek out our deeper values – those that are of the depths, those that our teachers remind us are so important. These are the values that can hold us together – as individuals and as a people – in the face of whatever chaos we encounter.
To do that, we need to put more attention onto what we stand for, than what we stand against. What we stand against can shape us, but what we stand for defines who we are. Over and again throughout history, I hear the values of Hospitality, Truth, Kindness, Courage, Love, Justice, Compassion, and Learning, to name a few. These are important values and transcend momentary laws and expedient traditions.
From the Heart
Let’s bring this home and do an experiment many of us have done before.
Forget for the moment what I’ve said. Focus your attention on your heart; imagine your breath entering and leaving your heart as you breathe deeply and slowly; call to mind some beautiful place or something for which you are grateful and hold that feeling for a moment in your heart as you continue to breathe there. . . . Ask your heart the answers to these questions:
What is it that means the most to you?
What is it that gives life meaning for you?
What makes life worthwhile?
If you had to choose, what do you value above all else?
When do you feel most whole?
And how do you feel right now as you contemplate these things?
I’ve done this many times with diverse groups of people. It’s amazing to me still the similar values that come to the surface, the things important to all of us. We share much more than we are divided. These are the values that have the power to restore identity, courage and peace.
Perhaps this is what the prophet Jeremiah meant when he said:
The days are coming,
when I will make a new covenant. . .
I will put my law/teaching in their minds
and write it on their hearts.
Let’s recognize that we will often fall short of this ideal of an alignment among our values, beliefs and action, but that’s OK. We are human and we, at times, misperceive, misjudge, make mistakes, lose touch with the heart, forget who we are but, even in those errors, if we pay attention, we may discover something of value.
In summary:
It’s natural to be upset by troubling things. It shows we are alive and conscious, but we don’t have to stay there.
It also shows that something of our values has been violated; but that awareness of violation can motivate us to deepen our consciousness and then to advocate for what we hold dear, so that our actions and beliefs can be aligned with the truth in our hearts. That, I believe, is what will save us.